Ever Wonder How

Ever wonder how exhausting it must be to be a man? I just wonder this because as I sit here to vent, he snores. I came home from work, cleaned the kitchen, determined and made dinner, sorted all the laundry,  started to wash laundry, picked up house, opened, sorted, read, and put away mail, loaded and ran dishwasher, folded load of laundry & started new load, hand washed left over dishes, emptied clean dishwasher, folded another load of laundry & started a new one, served him dinner, ate said dinner, cleaned plates from dinner and washed all dishes associated with said dinner, folded yet another load of laundry & started yet another. I hang up his last uniform shirt and what do I find, two d@%Π pens that he left in the arm of his uniform shirt. Now it's (hopefully not, but more than likely) ruined yet another uniform, stained the inside of my, did I mention, brand new dryer, and caused me more undue stress. All during this time he sat on the couch and watched tv. I want to be able to able to sit on the couch and watch tv, yes he worked today, so did I. I'll give him credit, he did mow the front of the lawn, it needed it and certainly had to be done before we got a freaking letter from the flipping HOA, but I'd still like to sit on the couch for more than 10 min. To add insult, as I'm sitting on the floor of my laundry room, scrubbing until my arms hurt the stains in the dryer (cause by aforementioned pens left in uniform) he comes in and says "Your not coming to bed tonight." And then huffs off into the bedroom...... oh...... my....... just ....... breathe....... needless to say, I could not get the ink off the inside of my dryer, and I sit here, listening to him snore, wondering if we'll ever be on the same page when it comes to what we each consider pulling our own weight. It frustrates me becauae I swear, he must think it happens on his own. He says to me that I never had to clean this much while he was deployed, well, ya, I didn't have another grown adult leaving his shoes all over the place, leaving cereal bowls in the sink with cereal hardened to a crust on the bowl, or taking something, anything out of it's place, and then leaving it where evere he used it last. The only mess I had to clean up after was my own, and I pick up after myself. Sure I devised a new, way less efficient method of reading the mail and making stacks out of bills, keep & file, shred, and trash,  but it was mine. I don't know, we are 8-9 months into the reintegration thing, and I'm pretty sure I/we suck at it. I just want my husband that picked up after himself and helps out back. I am tired of asking, begging, yelling, lecturing, nagging, and pulling teeth to just get him to do what is needed of him around here. Just because I was able to do it all by myself while he was in Iraq, doesn't mean I want to. If I wanted that I'd still be single. And who wants to go back, I wouldn't even want to wonder whatvit would be like,  but I still wonder how he can be so tired, from relaxing tonight.

Have a great night ya'll

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