Thursday, April 8, 2010

Just for a minute....Humor me

Can I just talk for a minute on the topic of Family Readiness? First, let me preface this by stating that this IS my full time paid job. No, I am not FRG, (I was previously and it was wonderful), I am a Family Readiness Support Assistant. Basically I help empower commanders to build a healthy, helpful, educational FRG program. That being said, I still wanna talk about it. Because I live and breath this stuff. It's my work and more importantly, my every day life. If it were not for the amazing women and men I met while volunteering, I don't know what I would have done. I was scared, new to the state, "Tech Support" was gearing up for a deployment on top of working full time for the Guard. OH, and I had no job. Needless to say, there were some moments, moments I'm not proud of, but I've learned and I've adapted. I became the HOOAH Wife that I am today for three main reasons. I am going to share the secrets, right here :-)

1. TALK TO YOUR SOLDIER & get the "REAL DEAL" from them!!!! My hubby educated me as to how it might "go" while deployed. He gave me worst case scenarios. It was terrible to think that I might not talk to him, my best friend in the whole world, for weeks on end. BUT it helped me in the long run. Do not be delusional about this situation, there will be times you won't get to talk to them, and just because your friend "Mary" gets to talk to her husband every day, doesn't mean you will. Missions are different, schedules are different for virtually every person. Don't complain to every single person that get so to hear form their soldier. AND FOR THE LOVE OF IT, DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT make comments like "It must be nice to have such a wonderful, loving husband that wants to talk to you". That's just nasty and makes someone NOT want to be your friend.

2. Find yourself a battle buddy. Now I know that I've already approached this topic before, but I don't think I can stress enough how wonderful it is to talk to someone, who understands acronyms, understands what it's like to have to learn over and over how to live with their spouse. How to get over tripping over those boots, and then miss tripping over those boots. Who else will understand the frustration of ruining a $27 pair of panties because they got into "that" load and you had to rip them away from the velcro (ya ya, I know, some of you still sew everything on, but some have the velcro - ruiner of all things it can) . This person will be your GODSEND when you need them. They will listen when you bitch, laugh with you when you need it, get drunk with you when you need that. They will help you through this even if you are not in the same phase (one of mine, her hubby is deployed, the other, her's just got a WARNO). My life would be incomplete without these two, as my life would be incomplete without my husband. YES, they mean that much. Find that bond within another military spouse, you will find the quickest and most amazing bond.

3. JOIN or help out with the FRG. When they have meetings, GO. Even if the unit is not deploying for 18 months, go. Get to know these people. They will help you prepare yourself for the next deployment. Because, let's be honest, with the political climate, at this point, it's not a matter of IF there will be a (or another) deployment, it's a simple matter of when. What happened last time, well, that will be different. Talk to these people and find out what is available to you. What resources are out there. WOW, we can get our pictures taken for free before and after the deployment, by a professional photographer? (Operation Love Reunited -if in the Central Texas Area, email me and I'll send you the info for the guy we used and he's amazing!!) WOW, we can get a free membership to the YMCA? There's free money for extra curricular activities for children ages 6-17 while mom or dad is deployed (ourmilitarykids.org). Ya, this an so much more. There is free counseling, free financial help, there is so much out there. All that aside, it is (supposed to be) a friendly, helpful, supportive organization that is there to help families connect during the most trying of times in their life. It will help children connect and bring people closer. One warning, Stay away from the gossip. FRG's are not the place for it, enough said.

Now I feel that I am rambling, but hey, again, as I've said, it's my blog ;-) I just want to convey how strongly I feel about family readiness, because the saying is true, a ready family makes a ready soldier. And you most certainly want your Soldier, Marine, Airman, Coastie, or Seaman "ready" when you send them to battle.

Any Questions?

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